A Letter to the Quiet Wheel

My dear little Quietest Wheel,

I could say so many things about you. You are the deliverer of the unexpected, deadpan one-liners. You love to vacuum. You are my sous chef and my rule follower and my tiny dancer. You are clever and creative and your enthusiasm for math intimidates me a tad.

And let’s just be real: your whole life, you have made parenting so easy. You are the calm eye in between the storm that is your siblings. If we’d had you first, oh goodness. Our confidence in our parenting skills would have been. Just. Obnoxious. (Shout-out to Bay for the humility. Thanks for the public tantrums, pal.) We have lots of loves in common and you are my go-to for a Sunday movie/snuggle session. Our bond is strong and deep and again: it’s just easy with you. Our southpaw, right-brained souls are entwined.

But let’s be really real: I know that you kiddos will each have your season where your needs will be greater in proportion to the other two. But I also know that lately, your slice of the pie has been on the smaller side.

I write that with tears in my eyes. It isn’t easy to admit when you take a child’s goodness for granted out of battle fatigue. I’m sorry that you are currently stuck on that raised middle seat, squished by tween angst on one side and a pint-sized tyrant on the other. I cannot predict the future, but I want to think it’ll all even out in the end.

In the meantime, I promise you that I will make more effort for days like today: days that you and I steal away just for us. Where we talk and giggle and swing hands and let the mist from the fountain hit us as you grin. Where you lean on me on the tram back to our car. Where I am all yours, even if just a few hours. Where you seem to bask in the glow, because by some miracle,  I am still the sun that you turn your face to for warmth. I need this time just as much as I know you do.

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Sweet girl, I am so sorry for taking one precious minute with you for granted. You deserve better. I promise not to make your gentleness feel like a flaw that gets you less of me. Because of all the things that are easy about you, the easiest is to love you.

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